December 09, 2003
My sister having read that I thought my site had gone the route of dull, decided to help me out and suggested that we write a top ten list. I came up with the topic and a couple of the choices listed below. The comments and order of the top ten were strictly all Ady, however I still think Care Bears the Movie II: The New Generation should have made the list.
TOP TEN BEST (HORRIBLE) CHILDHOOD MOVIES NO ONE ELSE REMEMBERS....OR REFUSES TO ADMIT THEY WATCHED
By Nuala and Ady
10. Labyrinth.....come on you all saw it...and i'd put money on the fact that's how most of us were at least introduced to the always amazing David Bowie, its the most fabulous creepy film that a child should be required to see.
9. The Cat From Outer Space......oh my god we loved this movie....a Sandy Duncan classic really....i mean can you honestly go wrong in your career making a movie about a cat - from outer space - with magical powers thanks to his flashy collar? brilliance.....
8. Can't Buy Me Love....by far the best Patrick Dempsey movie from the 80's...granted thats not saying much but its never good to set your standards too high when it comes to the 80's.
7. Ranibow Brite and the Star Stealer....yes kids that would be a Rainbow Brite film......do we feel guilty for having watched this - NO....do we feel guilty that we still watch it - maybe..... but it passes.
6. Vice Versa.....Judge Reinhold and the 80's phenomenon that was Fred Savage switch places as father and son - nough said.
5. The Apple Dumpling Gang......it's very possible that no one has ever seen this...it is without a doubt one of the dumbest films we ever watched....kind of a poor retarded man's version of Bonnie and Clyde... which i personally credit to the presence of Don Knotts in the film......but boy that Bill Bixby sure was cute.
4. Feds.....everyone soooo needs to see this movie. Rebecca DeMornay as a FBI trainee with that woman from Saturday Night Live who was in every movie in the 80's. this movie was the first to introduce us to the phrase and life lesson of "kick him in the balls".....quality fucking film.
3. The Devil and Max Devlin....almost no one has ever seen this movie...even we had to think for awhile to come up with the name of it...it was always just that movie with Bill Cosby and the white guy with the afro (Elliott Gould)....oscar worthy - NO...drunk purposeless party kinda worthy - YES.
2. Darby O'Gill and the Little People......this whole movie is validated by the presence of a then 18 year old Sean Connery, we need not mention anything else....except all those little people really did scare me....
1. Condorman.....the absolute best worst movie no one has ever seen......after you see this movie you no longer wonder why Michael Crawford doesn't really do tv or film anymore...you do however loose a small amount of respect for Oliver Reed....he must have done it for the money.....he must have just REALLY needed the money....may he rest in peace
Posted by nuala at December 09, 2003 05:54 PM
I've seen Condorman! More than once, I think, but all I remember is the rickety truck driving up a mountain. Wait! Did I say truck? I meant fabulous sports car with a condor painted on the hood. Gotta love Disney.
Also, Darby O'Gill is in my top 5 of childhood movies. For the little people and the scary banshees! (and the dashing S.C. v.18)
Feds. Hell yeah.
Did anyone ever see the My Little Pony Movie, with the memorable musical number "I'll Go It Alone"?
Sometimes I wonder if I just made that one up...
No I remember the my little pony movie. I bet Kristen saw it too. She was all about My Little Ponies. Although I don't remember that musical number in particular.
Don't forget Sean Connery Sings. He's 18 and bloody well sings!
And I do! I love Disney.
I've seen #4-6 many, many times. I also sat through "Troop Beverly Hills" far too many times. When Rilo Kiley played at Cal, I was so excited (their lead singer played Shelley Long's daughter, Hannah Nefler) that me and a friend made little badges that said Troop Beverly Hills and wore them to meet her.
Of course, she was perhaps even more memorable in the Savage Brothers '80s classic "The Wizard," in which Fred Savage responds to the evil Nintendo kid's advances with, "Yeah, well, uh, just keep your Power Gloves off her, pal, huh?"
the wizard! oh good! also in my childhood movies are: "willow", "flight of the dragons", "the last unicorn", and "the navigator". ooh and "the journey of natty gann" (john cusack!) and "neverending story" and "goonies"!!! HOW COULD YOU NOT HAVE GOONIES ON YOUR LIST?!?!
you know one of the best things about "can't buy me love"? seth green. hahahahaha! love that movie.
(saw my little pony too. and all the rainbow brite and care bear movies.)
i love this list thingamobob of yours. right on, ady and nuala. and i have seen all of your movies except condorman. i need to see that, i know.
Dood it was BAD movies you hate to admit you've seen. EVERYBODY LOVES Goonies, and flight of the navigator and journey of natty gann and neverending story.
However Troop Beverly Hills would have been good to add. We loved that one too.
i'm glad you all appreciated our little list. and just to note the reason the amazing and much loved films such as "Goonies" and "Troop Beverly Hills" and countless others are not on there is because we all openly admit we loved them....there's no denying that we watched those over and over and over.....we were going for the more obscure :)
thats so weird we posted that at the exact same time.....
That is weird....Sister connection I guess
doods, come on, Escape From Witch Mountain? fantastic film! though i only saw it once and remember almost nothing about it. but I think labryinth should be moved into the "goonies" category of actual good movies. david bowie and muppets. nothing could be better.
dood. where was i when i was a kid? i've never even heard of any of these, much less seen them.
i think i must have been a poor poor deprived wee ickle midget.
i agree that labyrinth belongs in the good pile. so many great moments. and escape from witch mountain should be banished from all memory forever. stupid sexist crap. girl can do whatever she wants but the boy has to use a goddamn harmonica. i prefer return to witch mountain, where the boy becomes evil and (i think) doesn't need the stupid harmonica anymore.
I considered submitting Witch Mountain for my sister's review, but we never really watched that one, maybe once, and I'm sorry but this was all about us.
Where were you Jade? Where? It's okay I own most of them. You can borrow them now and hate them because they are tinged with childhood memories.
the witch mountain ones were fun.
ahh, i see. bad movies. well...all right then. all my movies are good ones. screw this bad crap. i watched nothing i am ashamed of.
actually, the only thing i remember watching repetitively was disney's jungle book. and actually i only watched the part where the girl comes out of the forest and sings her little song and lures mowlgi away from his animal friends. i watched that part over and over and over because i thought the song was so pretty.
I love that part of the movie. The girl is pretty
father's hunting in the forest
mother's cooking in the home
i must go to fetch the water
til the day that i am grown
then i will have a handsome husband
and a daughter of my own
and i'll send her to fetch the water
i'll be cooking in my home
hoo man. i still remember. like it was yesterday. and let's be honest, i DID watch it yesterday.
Escape and Return to/from Witch Mountain are great! classics! telekinetic harmonicas! Tia's furrowed brow when she moves shit with her mind! I love it!
Holohan, what is your problem with women? You married one, didn't you?
but she's the home wrecker! she takes him away from the forest! fuck this return to civilization crap. she's like the devil. the devil in scanty clothing with a jar on her head. i always hated her. who would leave a panther for a mud village? who?! fooking mowgli.
plus the sexist nature of her song bugged me. i resented the fact that 1) i would ever have to fetch and carry water and 2) i'd have to make my daughter do it too. perpetuating the whole patriarchal bullshit cycle over and over again. fight back for your rights and the mother nature fetishism worship objects with the big hips and bigger breasts!
hoo. given michele's last comment i certainly see where this could lead. let's just say that after growing up watching the chipettes beat the chipmunks EVERY TIME they competed against each other, i became a little sensitive about girl superiority in children's entertainment.
And Michele you were how old thinking this?
well...i did always hate her. and i was really mad that he would leave the jungle. but i just made up all the rest of it.
chipmunks! i loved that movie with the hot air balloons! and the baby penguin! ahhhhh!
Oh my god I forgot about the Alvin and the Chipmunks movie where they fly around the world. That movie rocks my world.
Oh now I want to see it...
P.S Michele I was just a little intimated that you thought that critically that young, but know that I know you just didn't like her because she's the reason he leaves the jungle I'm okay with that cause really who would leave a panther for a girl. She was still pretty though.
for a while michele i thought you were talking about holohan's wife, and i was indignant on her behalf. and also thinking, when did holohan live in the forest? wtf? is this some metaphor for LA or something? but then i got it.
i am one of th emany little girls who fell in love with my little ponies, and robyn i do remember the musical number "ill go it alone" lickety split and spike sang it .. gotta love my little ponies.
i am one of the many little girls who fell in love with my little ponies, and robyn i do remember the musical number "ill go it alone" lickety split and spike sang it .. gotta love my little ponies.
i have also recently watched the chipmunks movie, im a sucker for cartoons from my childhood, they never get old. they music in them is so catchy lol