January 30, 2003
Michele Screamed Turkeys!

I'm dedicating this entry to my bored at work readers (Hi Jade! Frantic hand waving!) This entry should clear up Michele's latest entry for those of you who were confused.

So lately on our way home from the confines of lovely UC Berkeley, Michele and I have seen Turkeys, (yes Turkeys) standing in the middle of the road right as we are about to merge onto 680 after decending from the Berkeley Hills. So normally they are just sitting to the side of the road and we both scream "Turkeys!", giggle, perhaps contemplate what the hell they are doing there and then continue on our merry way.

Yesterday however was a rare treat. As we are coming down the hill Michele and I were both wondering where the Turkeys were, as we hadn't seen them in a couple of days, and low and behold all of a sudden two cars in front of us there was a sudden stop. The Turkeys were trying to cross the street. Why I don't know as across the street there is only a chain link fence and dirt and not the nice green hills they are used to playing on. So while this car is trying to get passed them to get on the freeway, the Turkeys are just wandering around in the middle of the road Michele and I are happily screaming "TURKEYS! TURKEYS!" and wondering why these people aren't beeping their horns at them.

The antics of the Turkey with the car directly in front of us was even funnier as they also didn't beep their horn and kept moving like an inch and then breaking as all the Turkeys were wandering too and fro in the middle of the lane with no clear direction. One in fact ran over to the car as if it wanted to check it out or hop in. (Turkeys are not very bright). Keep in mind that now there are at least 10 cars behind us probably wondering what the hell is going on, one of them being Bob, Kristen's dad. Then it was our turn and I immediately beeped my horn and the Turkeys knowing authority when they hear it all moved to the green side of the hill double time. As I start to drive past, Michele quickly rolls down her window and screams, "Turkeys" directly at the Turkeys as we drive by. I couldn't stop laughing and almost crashed from not being able to see the road with the tears in my eyes. I am in fact giggling about it right now with the mere thought of it all.

I still wonder if Bob gets as much enjoyment out of these Turkeys as we do. I hope so, because no one should pass up the chance to scream, "Turkeys!" when given the opportunity. I also wonder what these Turkeys do the rest of the day. Do they have other places to hang out? Why are they almost always there on our way home? Does someone take care of them? How did they get there? Is there a whole community of wild Turkeys in the Berkeley Hills? So many questions and no answers.

And for my avid conspiracy theory readers a conspiracy can be read into the strange appearance of these Turkeys. I mean it must be a consipiracy that the Turkeys are randomly there. Someone is trying to make competent drivers try and crash by distracting them with Turkeys, or someone is watching from the bushes tapping these antics for Funniest Home Videos. Or it could be a cover up for an even bigger conspiracy that my tiny brain cannot contemplate beacuase all I can think about is "Turkeys!" All I'm saying is watch out, those Turkeys are confused and dangerous (they are not bright like those squirrels though, they're just diabolical) but remember the way to foil the Turkeys is a good blast of the horn. Remeber that, blast of the horn. I'm still working on a way to foil the squirrels.

Posted by nuala at January 30, 2003 10:00 AM


oww owowowowow the pain.

giggle giggle.

seriously though i thought we were going to die yesterday. she couldn't catch her breath she ws laughing so hard and we had to MERGE right there with other moving vehicles.


Posted by: michele on January 30, 2003 10:12 AM

Q: so why did turkeys block the road?
A: cuz they couldn't find the other side!
hee hee..sorry super lame joke but just couldn't resist.

that was hilarious...i think i startled my coworkers here...rolling on the floor in convulsions.

...heh heh...still laughing....

Posted by: jade on January 30, 2003 01:51 PM

Even reliving the moment brings tears of laughter to my eyes.

oh god....hee hee.I think my co-workers are going to think I've gone slightly mad.

Posted by: Nuala on January 30, 2003 02:34 PM

Hmm... interesting stuff. I found your blog because I added you as one of my "AllConsuming" friends over at AllConsuming.net.

Thought I drop by and say hi.

Take care and keep in touch!

Posted by: Dan on January 30, 2003 03:19 PM

thanks for clarifying, nuala. between the intentinally infected cat scratches and the random turkey exultations, i'd begun to think michele had gone quite mad.although really even with this explanation, i still think the girl's crazy.

Posted by: erica on January 30, 2003 04:54 PM

"I'm only saying this because it has been hard for me at times to see myself having worth. But when I see myself having intrinsic value, I am not as apt to harm myself by picking at scabs, for example." so saith this dan johnson fellow on http://letterstogod.blogspot.com/ who IS this dan johnson fellow?

Posted by: michele on January 30, 2003 09:26 PM

I have no idea. I am so confused but, "Hi Dan!"

Posted by: Nuala on January 31, 2003 08:41 AM

Well I found out how Mr. Dan found us.


It seems that my book choices are pooled by this website to see what books people are mentioning and reading. It even has a picture of cementhorizon and lists of good friends which includes zembla, redhott, blawg, etc.

Interesting....who knew?!

Posted by: Nuala on January 31, 2003 10:45 AM

wow we're famous!

and can i just say,


Posted by: didofoot on January 31, 2003 11:05 AM

I know. I almost mentioned the goat thing, but it was even a little more random to mention than the turkeys.


Posted by: Nuala on January 31, 2003 11:08 AM

2 of those books are my books! why don't i get to be a google friend? sad little whimper.

Posted by: michele on January 31, 2003 11:22 AM

They're your books but they're on my site cause I'm reading um...So everyone Michele lent me the books she told me about them. I'm sure you're a google friend though, they just messed up. I consider you my googly friend.

Posted by: Nuala on January 31, 2003 11:46 AM

cause i'm GOOGLY!!


"look into my eyes and you will see that they are googly. cause i did it all for the cookie! yeah the cookie! yeah! so you could stick it in my maw! yeah! stick it in my maw! aajgjalGjGrjkgasljbsfjklb!"

mmmmm cookie monster parodies of limp bizkit.

Posted by: michele on January 31, 2003 12:20 PM

dood...michele...you crack me up

Posted by: jade on January 31, 2003 01:37 PM

I just Googled to see who linked to my "Letters to God" blog, and I noticed that you all did.

So, hello again! Take care and keep in touch!

Posted by: Dan on March 17, 2003 05:02 AM