Well, it's my bday and I'm 24. I've been sorta dreading my bday all week, mainly because it's been a pretty lonely week. I don't really have friends here and I only broke up with my boyfriend a month and a half ago, and there is always this expectation attached to your birthday, like it should be a big deal, like everyone should be celebrating you, like you should have a fabulous time, and when they don't and when it sucks it just makes it that much worse.

Despite my belief that it was going to be a bad day, so far it's been pretty good. The cat gave me a wonderful bday present and didn't wake me up once last night, nor did he wake me up at 5am demanding food. He never meowed once until I woke up and even then he came over quietly and just sat next to me purring, like he knew. I love my cat. It's amazing what an uninterrupted night of sleep will do for a girl.

Sumit called to wish me happy birthday and even came by later with a bday present (A gift certificate to Walter Claudio for a spa treatment) and of course Mom called. (As a side note shouldn't moms be celebrated on bdays and not kids? Hmmm...well I'm not going to argue about the custom)

And then I got an email from Amanda saying that she tried to send me flowers but didn't have my number which the florists were demanding. I don't need the flowers, just knowing somebody wanted to send me flowers makes me happy and Aaron (otherwise know as Mr. Shoefly) sent me an email and also let me know that they have built me a shrine at work and talk about how I did things at my job, like I was a miracle performer. (I'm sure he's exaggerating, but it's nice to know I'm loved)

So all and all I feel good today, which is a nice suprise. And even if today doesn't end up so great, this weekend will be fun as Michele, Kristen and Kim are coming to visit. So it's a girly fun weekend for me, interrupted with a bit of work.

So happy birthday to me....

I keep seeing previews for Once Upon a Time in Mexico and all I can say is I loved Desperado and now it has the added bonus of JOHNNY DEPP. Mmm Johnny. And he does that smile in the preview! Whew, I'm getting hot just thinking about it.

Where are all the other Johnny Depp types in this world. I mean come on. I'm half French. He married a French girl, can't I at least get half a Johnny.

Anyways me September 12 = at the movie theatre. Johnny and Antonio. Fun times.

I got the following email from my sister today. It made me laugh and it was kinda about me so I thought I would share.

so i'm at work really early reading this book called The Secret Meaning of Names and yes they actually have your name in there!

so i took the liberty of reading it and thought you should know that as far as i am concerned it's pretty dead on, as is mine. But i'm totally jealous - you have really good basic stats. Here they are:

Your element: Earth
Your Mineral: Sun Stone
Your Animal: Kangaroo
Your Plant: Lavender (i specifically hate you for this one)
Your Sign: Virgo
Your color: Green
and your personality type is so right on: EARTH MOTHER

And since I know you're dying to know, my basic stats are:

My element: Air
My mineral: Pitchblende (what the fuck?)
My Animal: Hedgehog (again, what the fuck)
My Plant: Valerian (never heard of it)
My Sign: Libra
My color: Blue
and my personality type is THE ENTERPRISING INTRIGUER
everything was pretty spot on, almost everything.

The book is caled the Secret Meaning of Names by Pierre Le Rouzic, you should really check it out if you're browsing in a bookstore anytime soon.


just thought you'd be interested, it seems like something i would find posted on your blog, fun interesting tidbit about yourself.

Hee hee....My animal is a kangaroo...hop hop

I thought I was doing ok, better than ok, with the whole break up thing and it's not that I'm doing badly now, but I MISS him. I mean it's like a physical ache. Suddenly I feel like ok, we've been apart for a while, now it's time to make up. I know it's stupid but I can't help feeling this way. I miss seeing him, I miss spending time with him and I miss talking to him.

What brought this on you ask? Well first I got hit on the other night when I went out with Nicole from work. It wasn't sleazy or bad. The guy was actually quite nice and flattering, but there was no "flutter, flutter" as Helena would say, and all I could think about was how he wasn't Sumit. Then tonight I went to dinner with Sumit and while it was nice it just made me miss him more. Being around him is so comfortable and familiar that it is hard to remember why we aren't together anymore. And he told his parents.

And so now I'm confused, and yet at the same time I know it's for the best that it's over. I don't have to deal with his whole parent situation as well as feeling like I'm not good enough. I mean since we broke up I haven't cried. That's four weeks of non bawling and seriously that is a record, because when we were together I was crying at least weekly. And that to me is one sign that it is for the best. I just don't know how can I miss someone so much while at the same time know it is best not to be around him? How can I want to be around someone that is obviously not good for me?

I don't actually know what stage of the breakup steps I am actually on, but I hope that these new feelings mean I'm moving on and not hoping for us to get back together. I hope that I'm working through this and not pretending to....

But I figure that If I can laugh at the fight scene in Bridget Jones as I type this, things can't be so bad. Maybe I should just move to London and find my Mr. Darcy. Mmmmm Colin Firth. Did I mention that neither of my housemates have seen Pride and Prejudice? You can bet there is going to be a Darcy-a-thon at my house as soon as the rommies are both back.

Writing this has made me feel better. Yea for the computerized pensive. I go laugh some more at Bridget now.